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The Long Goodbye, and the Wide, Wide Land
The Long Goodbye.
When you lose someone so precious and dear to dementia, no words can adequately express the feelings of loss, despair and love you went through in the long goodbye you experienced with this disease and the one you love, and the lingering fondness, memories, and everlasting love that you are left with over the years as they pass. The Wide, Wide Land does capture the rainbow of emotions some how, forever for me. Thus is the magic and beauty of music that can do that.
Thank you MLT for writing such a beautiful and perfect song I will cherish forever in loving memory of my mom.
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5 Replies
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Sometimes magic happens when worlds collide. God bless you, Jung. I can only imagine the emotions you go through listening to this beautifully haunting song. I find it very therapeutic when I can relate a song to personal experiences. It sounds like your happy memories shine the brightest.
Stay groovy,
JP
I was thinking about the re-playability of MLT. Most of the time when listening to CD’s I would usually switch to something else when the CD ended. With MLT though, I find myself doing a replay instead. Especially with the new releases. “Hey that was pretty kool! Play it again.” Perhaps their appeal is all of those little details.This video is a fine example. When I first saw it I did not understand the pale faces. But after it was explained I was impressed that MLT found such a gentle way to symbolize that condition.
My grandmother had dementia at the end, but we think it was related more to a lifetime of drinking. One of my last memories of her was when my cousin and I visited her. We had a nice chat with her as she felt like telling us how she met “our” father. We both silently realized she thought we were her sons, our fathers. We didn’t call attention to it and continued to listen as she told us how she met our grandfather. She could recall very detailed conversations and her eyes lit up as she told us about “our” father, and how he thought he was worthy of a date with her. As we were leaving my cousin looked at me and asked if I realized she thought she was talking to our fathers, her sons. I winked at him and we both smiled knowing how much she enjoyed telling her sons about how she met their father. That was about thirty years ago. It’s something how nice memories stick, or should I say,”It’s funny how life works out that way.”
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Thank you JP for the kind words, and thanks for sharing your fond memory with your Grand Mother as she talked about how she met your Grand Father. When my mom began to slip away with the dementia, I use to take her for drives as she loved going for drives as that calmed and soothed her, and in those moments I could feel she was happy. I think like your Grand Mother my Mom use to talk about her early adulthood and the many fond memories of growing up. Those were priceless moments, I wish I had recorded our on the road driving sessions from those times.
The Wide, Wide Land evokes so many memories and emotions of my mom when she went through dementia, mostly fond feelings now that only the music can express for me properly, feelings I can’t even describe in words.
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Yeah, I know what you mean Jung. My mother had Alzheimer’s and the last 4 to 5 years of her life she became someone I did not know. Over the last 2 years she didn’t know who I was and it was almost a blessing when she passed. Still I wouldn’t wish that disease on anyone.
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Sadly , as with Jung and anyone else who has experience of going through this with loved ones, I too, have, and “WWL” Profoundly, Poignantly resonates with me …
Sadly my late Dad after having a major stroke a few months after Mom passed, along with his other health issues, ongoing up until he passed on my birthday years later, became prone to, had multiple post ministrokes /seizures of sorts , left him with a form of dementia, though he knew who we all were , only once did he actually remember Mom having passed on ( we never mentioned that to him in case it triggered another setback ) , he had no time concept, no idea where was, in terms of tge LTC nursing home , in his mind he was at some hotel at some Nascar race somewheres in the USA , in Daytona or whatever on the Nascar circuit or in Oswego, NY at Modified race track he’d been going to a few times in a year , for as long as I recall, up until his health couldn’t handle it. It was like his mind had paused on a certain time frame, all things familiar to him, from a certain time, remained clear in his mind while sadly, other things, no more, his long term memory somewhat affected, short term affected….
That was hard to see him this way, even when we took him out to our our oldest brother’s home for Xmas/Thanksgiving/Easter, he had no clue anymore on the area he once drove through many a time, it was all new to him now, he didn’t even miss driving but before it got real bad, after recovering somewhat from first major stroke, he was still driving, until seizures….doctor had to take away his license, got depressed, as driving was his love …then his mind determined where tgat was no longer the case, but enjoyed being in a car, seeing sights, didn’t bother him no more that he couldn’t drive, just enjoyed the ride …
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Hi Mike, Jacki
Thanks for sharing your stories, and sorry to hear about your parents struggle with dementia. It is such a cruel disease, I felt so helpless when my mom went through it. It was like an unrelenting rising tide you couldn’t stop no matter what you did. Kind words from people who went through the same thing with a loved one was about the only thing that gave some comfort at the time.
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