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I Don't Know Words That Well
“I Don’t Know Words That Well”
(a song parody, to the tune of you-know-what!)
Here I sit, under the gun,
As I hold my pencil with a sigh.
The paper’s blank. I need to get this done.
I am stalling, and I’ll tell you why.
I know I don’t know words that well.
No, I always seem to struggle a lot.
I really wish that I could spell,
But it looks like, but it looks like I cannot.
Here I go. No more delay.
I’ve been tossing crumpled pages in a pile.
I know that I have got to find a way
Of improving on my orthographic style.
Well, I know I don’t know words that well.
No, they always stunt my creativity.
It occurs to me, if there’s a hell,
It would feel the, it would feel the same to me.
Now I sit, all afternoon,
And I think how long I’ve been preoccupied.
The nighttime will bring an end to this soon.
I’ve done as much today as if I’d died.
Well, I know I don’t know words that well.
No, they always seem to bring me bad luck.
If I knew them, maybe I could sell
My ideas, my ideas for a buck.
My ideas, my ideas… but I suck.
(Note to the prudish:Â sorry, that last line should be “but I’m stuck”.)
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4 Replies
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Lol… Oh David….Now that was funny and brilliant… Loved it… Something along the lines I would of said if I wrote up a parody… Usually I sing aloud any parodies I come up with around my own place but never write them down… Perhaps I should now… Keep these coming… You had me laughing quietly in the mall while I was reading this…..
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Thank you, Jacki! MLT has been such a creative inspiration to me that I actually found myself composing the refrain of another parody while I was putting the finishing touches on this one, so it looks like I’m not quite done yet.
Absolutely you should write down your parodies, both to share with the world (or at least a friendly subset thereof), and because there’s nowhere else to look up the words if you eventually start forgetting them.
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Bravo David! Another gem! Please keep ’em coming!
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Well done again David. I won’t be able to listen to this song the same way again.
As for the prudish, I think they’ve done well with your original last line.
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